Hosting Mayhem
by sumerjoy11
Summary: Blaineley is ecstatic to return to her job as a host for Celebrity Manhunt. However, things take a rather dramatic turn when Josh ends up with the flu, and a replacement comes in. Chris/Blaineley One-Shot


After her rather long recovery from crashing into a Chinese building, upon being shoved out of the Jumbo Jet by Chris McLean, Blaineley was back to hosting the gossip program, Celebrity Manhunt. To say that Blaineley was exhilarated to be back on the show would be an understatement. She craved the gossip, and she was hungry for more fame. Bandages and dollies weren't holding this gal back from doing what she loved most. Hosting.

On one particular day in the studio, Blaineley's co-host, Josh, was out on account of catching the flu. The interns were able to find a replacement for Josh until his recuperation. However, none realized that they had made a grave mistake.

"Where is this replacement co-host of mine?" Blaineley asked with her hands on her hips, tapping her foot off the ground. "We'll be rolling in 5 minutes."

"Right here!"

Blaineley gasped as her co-host entered the studio. "Y-You!" The hostess growled. "This is all you could find?!"

"I-It's Chris McLean," one of the interns stammered. "W-Who else would be able to fill in Josh's spot?"

"Besides, if anyone can dish out any dirt on the contestants, it's him," another intern added.

"Thanks for the support, guys," Chris grinned as he sat in his chair. "Better hurry up, Blaineley. We'll be on the air in less than a minute."

"Whatever," she grumbled as she took her seat.

"And five, four, three two..."

"Welcome to this week's Celebrity Manhunt! I'm Blaineley Stacey Andrews O'Halloran!"

"And I'm Chris McLean! I'll be filling in for Josh, while he's out with the flu. Get well soon, bro."

"At the end of Total Drama World Tour, the contestants were last seen fleeing for their lives from a volcanic eruption!"

"You were too, y'know," Chris stated.

Blaineley rolled her eyes, clearing her throat. "The Gwuncan scandal has been the talk of Total Drama fans. Everyone is wondering what has become of them since the end of season three? Well, we caught this never before seen footage of the lovers relaxing together at the beach. Let's have a look."

As the footage rolled, Chris turned to Blaineley. "So, how's it feel to be sitting back here? Pretty nice, huh?"

"D'oh, why do you care?" Blaineley huffed.

"Ouch, harsh."

"So, how about that?" Blaineley said as the clip ended. "Seems like Duncan and Gwen aren't going to let Courtney spoil their romance. Speaking of romance, another couple everyone's been questioning about is Alejandro and Heather."

"The last we saw of them, one lost the million, and the other lost his charming good looks. Poor sucker. Should've seen it coming," Chris continued.

"Y'know, Chris, I highly doubt you'd be snickering if you were the one drenched in lava."

"Moving on..."

"Oh, trying to switch the subject now, are we?" Blaineley teased.

"Yeah, _Mildred_. Anyway..."

"You did NOT just say that!"

"Uh, I did, actually," Chris smirked. "Why? Does someone not like her name?"

"Well, at least I'm not the one with a fake weave on my head."

"Oh yeah?" Well, at least I'm not prima donna that can burp and fart at the same time!"

"Cut! Cut, right now!"

"Oh no, keep it rolling! This is getting juicy!"

"Only for you, you sadistic narcissist!"

"Psh, is that the best you got?"

"I think I have a little something up my sleeve," Blaineley smirked as she turned to the camera. "You want gossip? I'll give you gossip! Rumor has it that Chris McLean flirted with Lindsay behind the scenes!"

"That's not true!" Chris yelled, his face burning.

"Oh yes! Right under Tyler's nose!"

"W-Well, you're the one who gushes over Justin!"

As the two hosts continued to bicker, the interns could only watch. They knew they couldn't interfere. After all, their jobs were on the line. All they could do was sit back and listen as Chris and Blaineley spewed dirt about each other on national television.

"I can't believe I had to be stuck with you of all people! You were the reason why I nearly broke every bone in my body!"

"Well, you had no right to bring up that you could've been the host of Total Drama instead of me!"

"Get over it!"

Chris growled. "You're a drama queen, y'know that?!"

"Oh, and I thought I was a 'ratings jewel'," the hostess quoted.

"You? A jewel? Psh, as if! You're more like a sack of cra-"

"SHUT UP!"

"Ooooo, Mildred's getting feisty!"

"THAT'S IT!"

Blaineley tackled Chris to the ground, prompting the camera crew to surround the hosts as they wrestled on the floor. The hostess was continuously slapping Chris across the face, while the host with the most returned the favor by yanking her hair.

"Jerk face!"

"Garbage eater!"

"Camera hog!"

"Fatso!"

"Get off me!"

"Make me!"

During the course of their fighting, the hosts rolled on the ground. Chris was on top of Blaineley. As the two realized the position they were in, they suddenly came to a halt.

"Uh...this is awkward," Chris said, breaking the silence.

"I-I'll say."

"...Wanna makeout?"

The cameras were once again capturing dramatic footage. However, this time, there was no violence on screen. The rest of the show consisted of Chris and Blaineley passionately kissing on the floor of the studio. Of course, this captured the attention of Blaineley's boss. When the show was over, he ordered both she and Chris to come to his room immediately.

"I saw everything," the man spoke, slowly rising from his seat, lighting up his cigar. "Not only did you two fail to tell the audience about the Total Drama contestants, but you were physically harming each other on national television! I will have no choice but to give you both a raise!"

"Look, I'm sorry about...wait, what?!" Blaineley exclaimed.

"Our ratings have sky rocketed because of you two! The audience loved it all! I'm already getting emails and phone calls about how they loved today's episode, and wanna see more of what you two got! Chris, we have to have you on the show more often. Maybe once a week."

"Uh, sure, I guess," Chris shrugged.

"Now, you two skedaddle. I have to come up with what we can do to boost our ratings even more!"

The hosts exited the room, neither uttering a word. As they stepped outside, however, Blaineley broke the silence by mumbling, "Wow..."

Chris cleared his throat, tugging at the collar of his shirt. "That...uh...that was...uh...really something."

"T-The last time I was sent in there, I lost my job."

"I honestly thought we were toast. Who knew people were into makeout sessions."

"Well, why do you think our audience is more focused on the couples than the show itself?" Blaineley asked as she dusted off her dress.

"Good point. Um, Blaineley?"

"What?"

"I...uh...I kinda take back all that stuff I said back there. Y'know, like how you're a garbage eater, how you gush over Justin, how you're..." Chris' eyes widened as he was cut off by Blaineley pressing her finger to his lips.

"Why don't we settle this at my place?" Blaineley offered, her eyes hooded. "I got a nice hot tub we can talk things over in, and some really good wine."

"Count me in!"

"My limo should be waiting in the back. C'mon," Blaineley said as she led Chris down the sidewalk. "Y'know, you're not that bad of a kisser for someone with such a dirty mouth."

"Right back at ya."


End file.
